GILLIGAN’S ISLAND "It's a Bird, It's a Plane, It's Gilligan" by Sam Locke and Joel Rapp January 24, 1967 TEASER FADE IN: INT - AIR FORCE BUILDING - DAY INSERT - MOVIE SCREEN SHOWING A MAN WEARING A JETPACK AND TAKING OFF. HE IS FLYING AND DROPPING SIMULATED EXPLOSIVES. THERE ARE TWO AIR FORCE OFFICERS WATCHING THE MOVIE. COLONEL Now watch this next maneuver General. INSERT - PILOT DEMONSTRATES VARIES MANEUVERS WEARING THE JETPACK SUCH AS FLYING OVER BUILDINGS AND SHIPS AND FLYING ACROSSED OPEN WATER. THE MOVIE ENDS. COLONEL Well Sir? GENERAL Ah, seems like quite a devise Colonel. You're ah convinced that I should authorize this for official Air Force use? COLONEL General, our tests in the Pacific indicate that the XJP will render all other manually controlled jetpacks obsolete. It's compact and lightweight. Practically anybody can operate it and it has a range of over five hundred miles. Frankly sir I think it's a perfect machine. There's a knock on the door. COLONEL Come in! A lieutenant enters the room and salutes. He is carrying a letter for the Colonel. LIEUTENANT Begging the Colonels pardon sir. COLONEL Yes Lieutenant? LIEUTENANT Just received this message from the test ship in the pacific sir. He hands the message to the Colonel who then reads it silently. GENERAL Bad news Colonel? COLONEL It seems out perfect machine has become a victim of human error sir. The General takes the message and reads out loud. GENERAL JETPACK XJP LOST AT SEA. PLEASE ADVISE. Yah that is bad news. COLONEL Yes sir. We certainly wouldn't want the XJP to fall into the wrong hands. Lieutenant, authorize the fleet to begin a search for the pack at once! LIEUTENANT Yes sir. The lieutenant salutes and walks out. COLONEL I wouldn't be too concerned General. The pack should stay afloat for several days and...Well I believe our ships will find it. GENERAL Good. You know what I can't believe is that man has reached the age where he can fly like a bird. You know...I haven't seen one of these since I was a boy reading the adventures of Buck Rogers! FLIP TO: EXT - LAGOON - DAY Gilligan and skipper are seen examining the jetpack that washed ashore. SKIPPER Buck who?! GILLIGAN Buck Rogers. He was the guy who use to fly around in one of these things. SKIPPER Oh Gilligan why don't you stop... The professor walks up behind Gilligan and the skipper. He doesn't see the jetpack at first. PROFESSOR Hi any luck? What's that!? GILLIGAN I think its Buck Rogers rocket. PROFESSOR Let me see that! GILLIGAN If it's Buck Rogers's rocket his mother would have sewn his name on it somewhere. SKIPPER Gilligan! There is no such person as Buck Rogers! He was a comic book character! GILLIGAN Did you ever meet Buck Rogers? SKIPPER Of course not! GILLIGAN Then how do you know he wasn't a real person!? SKIPPER I'm gonna explain it once more and then I'm... PROFESSOR Gilligan you're right! GILLIGAN I am? SKIPPER You mean...this does belong to Buck Rogers? PROFESSOR No! But this is a jet powered flight pack and it's practically full of fuel! SKIPPER Well maybe we can find some way to use it to get off the Island! PROFESSOR I'll begin experiments right away! You know...it's just possible that there's enough fuel in this jetpack to get it all the way back to Hawaii! SKIPPER Oh boy! Let's start experimenting! Come on Gilligan! Gilligan, the skipper and the professor take the jetpack and run off down a path next to the lagoon. FADE OUT: ACT ONE FADE IN: EXT - HUT - DAY STOCK SHOT OF HUT EXTERIOR WITH CREDITS OVERLAYED CUT TO: INT - HUT - DAY The professor is seen in his hut with tables loaded with test tubes and various other equipment made from gourds, bamboo and vines. The professor is just about to mix two samples in test tubes when the Skipper and Gilligan come running into the hut. GILLIGAN Hey professor! Professor! The professor, being startled, spills the two test tubes. PROFESSOR Oh good heavens, look what you made me do! SKIPPER Sorry professor, but we're dying to find out if this jetpack is going to be able to fly to Hawaii! PROFESSOR Well there's a chance skipper, but... SKIPPER Did you hear that Gilligan!? One of us might be able to fly to Hawaii! Isn't that great news!? GILLIGAN Yeah it's a long trip there. I hope the jetpack has a good movie! SKIPPER Yes, so do I because... The skipper gives Gilligan a dirty look. PROFESSOR When you gentlemen leave I can complete this fuel analysis. SKIPPER All right professor we're going right now, come on Gilligan. As the skipper and Gilligan start leaving the hut, Gilligan turns around and starts to ask another question. GILLIGAN Professor I have just one more question... The skipper, seeing what Gilligan is doing, grabs him and hauls him out of the hut. The skipper and Gilligan leave the hut as the professor returns to his table and begins his experiments again. As before, as he begins to mix the two test tubes together, Mary Ann and Ginger come running into the hut. MARY ANN Oh professor! GINGER Professor! Once again, being startled, the professor spills the test tubes. PROFESSOR Why did you girls have to burst in to the middle of an experiment?! GINGER Ah we're sorry professor but we heard that Gilligan found some kind of a jetpack to get us off the island! PROFESSOR Well it's possible Ginger, but I won't know until I complete these tests. GINGER OH you just don't know how disparately I want to breathe the heady wines of civilization again. OH to meet a tall handsome man and have a candle lit dinner for two and then after dinner to dance...OH just to float...just float through the air until dawns gentle fingers pull back the soft blanket of night. That's a scene from a tender romantic movie I was in. It was called "The bird people meet the chicken pluckers". PROFESSOR All right will you girls LEAVE now so I can continue my work! GINGER & MARY ANN But professor! PROFESSOR All right OUT! SHOO! I'll let you know the results the moment I'm finished! Now GO! The professor escorts the girls to the door and sees them out. He checks outside once again to see if there is anyone else lurking outside. Again, the professor returns to his work, confident there will be no further interruptions. As he begins to pour the two test tubes together just as Mr. and Mrs. Howell run into the hut. Mr. Howell grabs the professor's arm to get his attention. MR HOWELL Professor! Once again the professor spills the contents of the test tubes. MR HOWELL Oh I'm terribly sorry! MRS HOWELL Oh dear professor did we cause you to spill that?! PROFESSOR Oh not at all Mrs. Howell. I've had so much practice recently I could have spilled it without you help. MR HOWELL How soon will you know if the flight is feasible? PROFESSOR Well if you'll both be quiet, I will know in a minute. The professor pours the two test tubes together and one of them foams up and over the top with a blue foam. MRS HOWELL Well professor? Can one of us fly off for help now? PROFESSOR I'm afraid not Mrs. Howell. Although my experiments indicate the jetpack has sufficient flight range to reach Hawaii, I'm afraid such a flight would be terribly terribly risky. MR HOWELL Nothing is too risky to save a Howell. MRS HOWELL Two Howells dear. MR HOWELL That's right, make that two Howells. PROFESSOR Besides risk, we're facing a time problem. You see the fuel in this jetpack has given me a propellant potency retention problem. MR HOWELL How dare you talk that way in front of my wife! PROFESSOR A what I meant was, that this particular type of fuel loses its potency when it gets old. MR HOWELL Nonsense professor! Haven't you heard...there's no fuel like an old fuel! HA that was a witty one! FLIP TO: EXT - HUT - DAY Mr. and Mrs. Howell are seen crouched down behind some jungle plants watching the professor leave the hut where he's been doing the experiments. MR HOWELL (SOTTO) Let's sneak in and get the jetpack. MRS HOWELL Oh it seems such a mean trick to play on Gilligan. MR HOWELL (SOTTO) Well I know how you feel dear, but...but you heard the professor. If one of us doesn't attempt this trip soon, our chance at being rescued will be ruined. MRS HOWELL True. MR HOWELL (SOTTO) Gilligan is the only one on the island that can make this trip. He's young, he's wiry and he's agile. Besides who else could we possibly trick into doing it!? FLIP TO: EXT - JUNGLE CLEARING - DAY Mr. Howell is seen wearing the jetpack as Mrs. Howell is seen with Gilligan as she attempts to stop Mr. Howell from taking the flight. MRS HOWELL You see Gilligan he's determined to go through with this! MR HOWELL Lovey! How dare you bring Gilligan here! He's sure to try and stop me from...from making this flight. GILLIGAN Now wait a minute Mr. Howell. MR HOWELL I don't know how to forgive you Lovey for what you've done! GILLIGAN Don't be angry Mr. Howell. She doesn't want you to make the flight either. MR HOWELL Well if I won't make the flight who will? GILLIGAN Well... MR HOWELL Ah HA! I should have known that you would want to grab the glory! GILLIGAN Oh... MR HOWELL Oh you can't fool me Gilligan! You know who ever makes this flight will be a national hero! And you're aching to go instead of me! GILLIGAN Is that what you think!? MR HOWELL I don't THINK sir, I KNOW! GILLIGAN I know you don't know either! MR HOWELL Now wait a minute, wait a minute don't try and stop me! Cause it won't do any good. GILLIGAN Ok I won't try and stop you. MR HOWELL Well I know your persistence is hard to breakdown my boy, but before you convince me that you should go instead of me. Give me one good reason, one sir, why I shouldn't make this flight! MRS HOWELL Thurston, if anything happened to you, who would take care of me and all our beloved little Howells? GILLIGAN What beloved little Howells? MRS HOWELL Well the Howell steel company and the Howel chemical company and the Howell... MR HOWELL That's just it Lovey! I'm tired of being a man who's known for the companies he keeps! I want to be known as a man who would risk his life for his dear and beloved friends! MRS HOWELL Oh Thurston! MR HOWELL Please try to understand Gilligan. Despite my advanced age, and my physical inability, and the fact that you're more qualified, I am going to make this flight! So please leave me to do...what I must do! GILLIGAN That's very brave and noble Mr. Howell. But I think I ought to be the one that takes the flight. MRS HOWELL There you just go! You heard what Mr. Howell said. Go ahead! I want to be alone to say goodbye to my husband. Gilligan walks off as Mrs. Howell is saying her last goodbye. MR HOWELL Lovey how could you!? MRS HOWELL Oh darling how could I what, you brave courageous thing? MR HOWELL Well how could you make Gilligan go away? MRS HOWELL But you SAID you wanted him to leave! MR HOWELL No it was just an act, to trick him into making the flight! MRS HOWELL Oh darling I forgot what a marvelous actor you were! Oh and all this is just a little play. Are you furious with me? MR HOWELL Of course not...it's showbiz! DISSOLVE TO: EXT - JUNGEL CLEARING - DAY Mary Ann and Ginger are in the clearing with Ginger wearing the jetpack. GINGER Hurry up Mary Ann, I think I hear Gilligan! Hurry up! MARY ANN Ok... Oh Gilligan! Gilligan! Oh come quick! GILLIGAN What is it Mary Ann? MARY ANN Oh Gilligan, Ginger is going to fly to Hawaii, you've got to stop her! GILLIGAN You better find somebody else. I already tried to stop Mr. Howell and couldn't do it. GINGER Nobody is going to stop me Mary Ann. If I have to sacrifice myself for my friends I intend to do so. GILLIGAN You don't want to sacrifice yourself! GINGER Of course I do! Is there a brave decent person on this island that wouldn't want to? GILLIGAN No, but there's a rotten cowardly person that doesn't want to. MARY ANN Gilligan! GILLIGAN You guessed it! GINGER Mary Ann...um...would you give me a few minutes alone with Gilligan? Marry Ann gets the high sign from Ginger and pretends to leave. GINGER Gilligan? GILLIGAN Hmmm? GINGER There's something that I want to do before I fly away. GILLIGAN Buy insurance? GINGER No. I want to give you a goodbye kiss. GILLIGAN You don't have to! I'm not going anyplace! Ginger starts to kiss Gilligan as Mary Ann removes the jetpack from Ginger and places it on Gilligan. Ginger continues to kiss Gilligan as Mary Ann straps the jetpack into place. CUT TO: EXT - JUNGLE - DAY The skipper and the professor are seen walking through the jungle near where Ginger and Gilligan are. SKIPPER ...I see, well, now let me get this plan straight professor. We build a dummy, we strap the jetpack to it, pin a note to it and then send it off to Hawaii from a launching pad. PROFESSOR Exactly! Here's the drawing I made. The professor hands skipper the paper with the drawing. The skipper examines the plans intently. SKIPPER Wow what a brilliant idea! PROFESSOR Well frankly skipper, I think it's my most brilliant idea. There's only one thing I'm not certain of. SKIPPER Oh what's that? PROFESSOR If it'll work! The skipper and professor look up and notices Ginger kissing Gilligan. CUT TO: EXT - CLEARING - DAY Gilligan is wearing the jetpack as Mary Ann looks on. CUT TO: EXT - JUNGLE - DAY The skipper and professor look on as they see Ginger and Gilligan still locked in a kiss. SKIPPER Wow, I wonder what's going on over there!? The skipper and the professor take off towards the clearing to see what's going on. CUT TO: EXT - CLEARING - DAY PROFESSOR Good heavens...what's going on here?! GINGER Ah professor...wa...well... MARY ANN Well I guess we'd better confess Ginger. We were desperate, we wanted somebody to try to fly to Hawaii. PROFESSOR Well you can stop being desperate Mary Ann. Someone IS going to fly to Hawaii! GINGER They are?! Who?! SKIPPER The dummy! At hearing the word dummy, Gilligan comes too from his encounter with Ginger. GILLIGAN Huh? What'd you say? SKIPPER I said the dummy is going to fly to Hawaii! Gilligan thinks the skipper means him and over reacts immediately. GILLIGAN Oh no I'm not! I'm not flying anyplace! How'd I get in this thing?! Let me out of here! I'm getting out of here! Gilligan gets the jetpack off and hands it away. GILLIGAN Here take this jetpack! Gilligan runs off screen. DISSOLVE TO: INT - HUT - DAY Ginger and Mary Ann are busy at work on the dummy. MARY ANN There! How do you think he looks? GINGER Well...he's not exactly Rock Hudson, but I guess he'll have to do. Now we have to make sure he's six feet five inches tall. MARY ANN How we gonna find that out without a tape measurer? GINGER Easy! Ginger walks up to the dummy and puts her arms around it's neck and waist as though she's going to kiss it. MARY ANN Ginger, what are you doing? GINGER Well I use to go steady with this basketball player, he was exactly six feet five...and I know just how much I had to reach up to kiss him. Mrs. Howell enters the hut and does not immediately notice Ginger with her arms around the dummies neck and waist. MRS HOWELL Oh Ginger have you got a...? GINGER What is it Mrs. Howell? MRS HOWELL Well I don't mean to meddle dear, but since that dummy is about to fly away, do you think it wise to become emotionally involved? DISSOLVE TO: EXT - JUNGLE CLEARING - DAY Gilligan, the skipper and the professor are standing around an angled launch pad with the dummy lying against it. SKIPPER There's just one thing I don't understand professor? PROFESSOR Yes? SKIPPER Well...how's the dummy going to operate the jetpack when he flies to Hawaii? PROFESSOR You see, by building him to exact height and weight specifications...and by placing him precisely at the proper angle on the pad, I feel the essential thrust of the rocket will be enough to send him on a direct and unswerving azimuth to Hawaii. SKIPPER Ah...did you hear that Gilligan? GILLIGAN My right ear heard it, my left ear is waiting for the translation. PROFESSOR I merely said the dummies all set to go! GILLIGAN Oh you know skipper, I'm kind of worried about the dummy making the flight. SKIPPER Oh you don't have to worry about that, the professor's got it all worked out. Dummy will definitely fly to Hawaii. GILLIGAN Do you think he's dressed right? You know it's the rainy season in Honolulu. SKIPPER Yes I know but I don't think he should... Oh will you stop with that conversation! PROFESSOR Now...all I have to do is write this note, put it on the dummy and we'll be all set to blast off. GILLIGAN Have a good trip dummy! Don't forget to write! Gilligan gives the dummy a good luck slap on the back and the dummy falls over face down. The professor and the skipper are not too pleased. GILLIGAN I'll pick it up. Gilligan straddles the dummy in order to pick it up and inadvertently hits the activation button on the end of the control grip. The jetpack activates and Gilligan and the dummy start to jet across the ground through the jungle. PROFESSOR Gilligan stop him! I haven't finished the note! GILLIGAN Skipper! Skipper! The skipper and the professor take off after Gilligan who is now screaming along a jungle path on the back of the dummy. CUT TO: EXT - JUNGLE - DAY INSERT: VIEW POINT JUST BEHIND GILLIGAN OF TRIP THROUGH JUNGLE AND OUT INTO THE LAGOON. CUT TO: EXT - LAGOON - DAY Gilligan rides the dummy into the lagoon and falls off. The skipper and the professor come to Gilligans aid. illigan crawls out of the lagoon and onto the shore. GILLIGAN Ah, ah...where's the dummy!? Oh here it comes. The dummy and jetpack slowly arrive back on shore and is pick up by the professor, which he then examines. PROFESSOR Oh I was afraid of that! The trip through the jungle and the water carrying the extra weight used up practically all the fuel! SKIPPER WHAT! You mean we won't be able to fly it to Hawaii?! PROFESSOR Afraid not. SKIPPER Will the real dummy PLEASE stand UP! The skipper gets frustrated and hits Gilligan with his hat. FADE OUT ACT TWO FADE IN: INT - HUT - DAY Gilligan, the skipper and the professor are in the professor's hut with the jetpack. The professor has been examining the jetpack after Gilligan's little trip. SKIPPER Well professor? PROFESSOR Well...my original conclusion was correct. After Gilligan's little cruise around the lagoon, there isn't nearly enough fuel left for a flight to Hawaii. SKIPPER (to Gilligan) You know what you are!? You're bumbling, stupid, incompetent and useless...and those are your good points! GILLIGAN Your right skipper. Gilligan takes the skipper's hat and hits himself with it. GILLIGAN I deserve it. Mr. and Mrs. Howell come running into the hut. MR HOWELL Professor! Professor! We...we heard the most marvelous news on...on the radio...the news cast! MRS HOWELL All Mr. Howell's stocks have gone up! MR HOWELL A no...that's not the good news. We heard there'll be a fleet of ships in the area tomorrow to make a final search for the jetpack! That's the good news. SKIPPER What do you make of that professor? PROFESSOR Well it's a long shot skipper, but I've got an idea that might reduce the odds. GILLIGAN Can I help professor? PROFESSOR Please Gilligan... GILLIGAN I want to do something to make up for what I did. Please professor? SKIPPER Gilligan, why don't you go take a flying leap! PROFESSOR That's it exactly skipper! That's the basis for my whole idea! A flying leap! GILLIGAN Huh? PROFESSOR All right listen. There's enough fuel left in the jetpack for about a fifteen minute flight. Now suppose one of us were to put on the pack and go straight up while the ships were in the area. That would improve our chances of being spotted immeasurably! SKIPPER Certainly would! Well that makes great sense! MRS HOWELL Oh professor! It's wonderful having someone like you with us! Your absolutely marvelous! MR HOWELL If you were a Republican, you'd be perfect. DISSOLVE TO: EXT - HUT - DAY Mr. Howell, Gilligan and the skipper are pacing around outside the hut where the professor is working waiting for the results of his tests. GILLIGAN The professor sure is taking a long time to decide whether his plans gonna work or not. MR HOWELL Oh it will work Gilligan. The professor's trying to decide who will get the assignment of strapping on the jetpack and soaring up in the air. SKIPPER Oh I guess that's it. MR HOWELL A well...I suggest to save time, we volunteer. Anyone volunteer to go up one hundred feet? Ninety feet? Anyone willing to put on my elevator shoes? The professor walks out of the hut. SKIPPER Well professor? PROFESSOR Well it'll work. One of us can go up in the morning and the flight should be comparatively safe. MR HOWELL I knew it! NOW who will volunteer? PREOFESSOR Mr. Howell we can't pick our flyer on a volunteer basis! MR HOWELL Well why not? GILLIGAN Because no one wants to volunteer! MR HOWELL Well that's not true I am not afraid, I would love to go! SKIPPER Oh come on Mr. Howell! PROFESSOR Oh I'm sure Mr. Howell is quite sincere. But since the rise in altitude causes a lose of oxygen to the brain, we're going to have to take a test to determine which of us is least likely to become light headed or dizzy. MR HOWELL Take me...take me professor! I'd love to soar into the wild blue yonder I would... Mr. Howell suddenly gets frightened as he realizes he has a fear of heights and is up on is toes as he was speaking. MR HOWELL I get so dizzy on my tippy toes! Mr. Howell grabs the professor for support. MR HOWELL Oh hold me professor! DISSOLVE TO: EXT - CLEARING - DAY Mary Ann is peddling a bicycle like device used to rotate a large cylinder made from scraps of wood and bamboo. Ginger is standing by the cylinder as it goes around and is keeping time. GINGER Time Mary Ann! Mary Ann stops peddling and gets off the bike. The cylinder slows to a stop and Ginger opens the door. The skipper, Mr. Howell and the professor step out in slow motion. They spin and fall in slow motion as it's apparent they are all extremely dizzy and disoriented. SKIPPER Wow I can hardly walk! MR HOWELL I haven't felt like this since I was elected president of the wine tasting society. PROFESSOR Where's Gilligan? MR HOWELL Yeah. Just then, Gilligan pops his head out of the door of the cylinder. It's apparent the rotation has had no effect on him. GILLIGAN Hi everybody! Is the ride over already? That's too bad, I was just having fun! MARY ANN Why Gilligan isn't dizzy or light headed! SKIPPER That's because he's dizzy and light headed all the time. He's just use to it. MR HOWELL Gilligan my boy, you've been selected as our astronaut fairly and squarely. GILLIGAN I have!? Could we take the test over again, this time I'll cheat a little! PROFESSOR Oh come on Gilligan you're about to begin your training as an astronaut. GILLIGAN Oh professor do I have to? GINGER Well your not afraid are you? GILLIGAN Me afraid? Me afraid? Me afraid!! DISSOLVE TO: EXT - CLEARING - DAY Gilligan is hung from vines and is seen swinging back and forth. The skipper is pulling on vines making Gilligan swing. Mr. and Mrs. Howell are seen laying on lounge chairs, drinking their tropical drinks and enjoying the afternoon. MR HOWELL Ninety eight...ninety nine... MRS HOWELL Thurston? MR HOWELL Ah yes my dear? MRS HOWELL This astronaut training is rather vigorous isn't it? MR HOWELL Yes it's hard to relax with Gilligan hanging about. How's your drink my dear? MRS HOWELL Very nice thank you. MR HOWELL Would you care for another one? MRS HOWELL Oh thank you dear...this time would you give me a little mint? MR HOWELL Which little mint would you prefer? The one in Denver or the one in San Francisco? Ha! That's a Howell rich joke! GILLIGAN What's the count Mr. Howell? MR HOWELL The count? MRS HOWELL Oh of course darling we were suppose to count his swings. MR HOWELL Oh yes yes...onesy, and now big...big twosy! SKIPPER NEVER MIND! what time is it Mrs. Howell? MRS HOWELL Oh it's so hard to see without my lorgnette. It's a...four rubies past a diamond. SKIPPER Well I think he's had enough! Let's let him down. The skipper helps Gilligan get down from swinging. SKIPPER Are you all right little buddy? GILLIGAN I think so, but I don't think I was cut out to be a swinger. DISSOLVE TO: EXT - CLEARING - DAY The professor is standing next to the launch guide as the skipper carries Gilligan over his shoulder. Gilligan is obviously not in great shape after the hours of training SKIPPER Here's our astronaut professor. PROFESSOR What's wrong with him? SKIPPER Well he's just so exhausted from all the astronaut training that he's sound asleep. I better wake him up. Come on Gilligan...wake up. Wake up! Are you awake little buddy? Gilligan appears to wake up and be responsive. GILLIGAN Sure skipper! SKIPPER Ah fine. The skipper lets go of Gilligan who promptly goes back to sleep and fall down on the ground. PROFESSOR Let's get him into the jetpack and onto the launch pad before he wakes up. According to the last news flash, the ships won't be in the area for another ten minutes. SKIPPER All right lets get him up. DISSOLVE TO: EXT - CLEARING - DAY Gilligan is now seen wearing the jetpack and standing at the launch pad. SKIPPER Gilligan little buddy? Gilligan? Wake up! Rise and shine! Gilligan wakes up and is still very groggy. GILLIGAN Hi skipper. I was dreaming about wearing the jetpack and blasting of into space. I'm going back to sleep and see how it turns out. SKIPPER But that's no dream Gilligan, you are going to blast off in a jetpack! GILLIGAN I am? SKIPPER Yes! Gilligan becomes fully awake and realizes he's wearing the jetpack and panics. GILLIGAN I am! Oh I'm getting out of here! Gilligan makes the attempt to leave but is held back by the skipper. SKIPPER Oh now wait a minute Gilligan, we've got to get you up in the air so those Navy ships can spot you and we can all get off the island. PROFESSOR Gilligan, I'm sending the radio up with you so you'll know from the news flashes exactly when the ships are in the area and exactly when they've spotted you. The professor places the radio which has a cord through the handle around Gilligan's neck. PROFESSOR Good luck! GILLIGAN Professor do I really have to!? The professor takes a pocket watch and uses it as a countdown timer. The skipper is busy preparing gilligan for his flight. All three are talking at once. SKIPPER GILLIGAN PROFESSOR All right, count down Ah professor I ten Don't think we nine Should leave this Island! Eight Would you get his I mean I really like seven hand there it very very much! Six Professor. It's really a nice Island! five Put your hand on I'm not going up! Four This. I'm not going up! Three I'm not! Two Good luck I'm not going up! One Gilligan! I'm not! Blast-off (skipper activate the jetpack) I'm going up! Oh I'm not gonna go up again! Gilligan blasts off and goes straight up with a cloud of fire and smoke. INSERT: AN ACTUAL BELL LABRATORIES JETPACK IS SEEN FLY OVER TREES. THE PILOT IS DRESSED LIKE GILLIGAN WITH A RED SHIRT AND LIGHT BLUE PANTS. CUT TO: EXT - JUNGLE - DAY All the castaways are present and are standing on a slight hill. The professor is looking through a pair of binoculars as the others look skyward. SKIPPER Well do you see him professor? PROFESSOR There he is! And he's just at the right altitude for our ships to spot him. CUT TO: GILLIGAN IN JETPACK AT ALTITUDE HOVERING. GILLIGAN It's not so bad up here! In fact it's kind of fun! I'm a bird! I'm a plane! I'm super Gilligan! A seagull flies past Gilligan as he hovers at his assigned altitude. The seagull "quacks" like a duck. GILLIGAN It's the only way to fly! CUT TO: EXT - JUNGLE - DAY The castaways are still in same position looking skywards. MARY ANN Won't it be wonderful when those sailors pick us up Ginger? GINGER Won't be the first time it's happened to me Mary Ann! CUT TO: GILLIGAN HOVERING GILLIGAN Shouldn't be too long now. Better keep my ears open for the news. Gilligan reaches down and turns on the radio. Gilligan is still tired and yawns. GILLIGAN Keep my eyes open too. The radio being on, now has a news bulletin of interest. RADIO "WE INTERRUPT THIS PROGRAM TO BRING YOU A BULLETIN FROM THE PACIFIC, WHERE NAVY SHIPS ARE SEARCHING FOR A LOST EXPERIMENTAL JETPACK. THIS IS CHICK HERN REPORTING TO YOU FROM THE DECK OF THE DESTROYER REDWOOD AND WE HAVE JUST SIGHTED A UFO IN THIS AREA!" GILLIGAN A UFO!? That's an unidentified flying object from another planet! Uh I wonder where it is I wonder where it is! RADIO "ABOUT TWO HUNDRED AND FIFTY MILES SOUTH OF HAWAII." GILLIGAN That's right where I am! RADIO "NAVY OBSERVERS HAVE NOT YET DETERMINED WHETHER THE UFO IS FRIENDLY OR UNFRIENDLY." GILLIGAN I'm not waiting to find out. I'm getting out of here! Gilligan kicks in the rocket and rises in to a cloud. RADIO "LADIES AND GENTLEMEN THE UFO HAS JUST DISSAPEARED INTO A CLOUD BANK." GILLIGAN Yeah good! As long as it's in a cloud it'll never see me! CUT TO: EXT - JUNGLE - DAY The castaways are still watching the sky. MR HOWELL What's the matter with him professor? MARY ANN What's he doing? PROFESSOR Well he's steered himself into a cumulous cloud! SKIPPER Oh no! If he's in the cloud those ships won't be able to spot him! PROFESSOR Oh that's not the worst of it! MRS HOWELL Oh what do you mean professor? PROFESSOR Now that he's flown into a cumulous cloud, the exhaust from the jet fuel is bound to seed the water vapor and the result of that will be... It starts to rain heavily GINGER RAIN! PROFESSOR That's a reasonably accurate guess Ginger! They all try to protect themselves as it continues to rain harder as they run back to their huts. DISSOLVE TO: INT - HUT - DAY Everyone is either seated or standing in the hut. They are all soaking wet and are using blankets to keep warm. Gilligan is back with them and the radio is on the table. RADIO "AND SO AS A RESULT OF THE UNEXPECTED HEAVY RAIN STORM IN THE AREA, THE NAVY HAS DECIDED TO ABANDON THEIR SEARCH FOR THE LOST JETPACK" GINGER That's the end of that. SKIPPER (TO GILLGAN) And all because you dived into a cloud and started the rain! GILLIGAN Yeah but the radio said there was a UFO in the area and I was scared. PROFESSOR Gilligan there was no need for you to be frightened. You were the UFO they spotted. GILLIGAN Huh? MARY ANN They saw you flying around up there and reported an unidentified flying object. GILLIGAN Me? A UFO? SKIPPER Yeah and you scared yourself right into ruining our chances of getting off the island! GILLIGAN Well if I'm a UFO I gotta know one thing! SKIPPER What's that? GILLIGAN Am I from Mars or Venus? Where do I come from? SKIPPER It all depends on how far I have to chase you! The skipper takes off after Gilligan and chases him around the hut. Gilligan runs for the door with the skipper hot on his heels. At the last second, Gilligan dodges to the left and the skipper heads out the door by himself. Gilligan seeing he's now safe, latches the door to keep the skipper out. The skipper now standing outside in the rain is not too pleased. He reaches through the doors window and unlatches the door. The skipper, now in full threatening view of Gilligan, signals Gilligan to join him in the rain which Gilligan does without complaint. The other castaways find this rather humorous and begin laughing. FADE OUT EPILOG FADE IN: INT - HUT - DAY The Skipper and the professor are seen entering the hut where the professor has been conducting more experiments with the jetpack. PROFESSOR ...Once I figured out how to synthesize the jet fuel, it was a simple matter to make enough to make two trips to Hawaii. SKIPPER Oh boy professor! How soon are we gonna try it!? PROFESSOR Well I've already filled the fuel tanks on the jetpack and once we build a new dummy we can... The professor notices the missing jetpack. SKIPPER What's the matter? PROFESSOR The jetpack is gone! Mary Ann comes running into the hut. MARY ANN Oh professor! Skipper come quick! PROFESSOR What's the matter!? MARY ANN Oh it's Gilligan! He's put the jetpack on and he's gonna launch himself to Hawaii! SKIPPER Oh no! MARY ANN Oh he thinks it's his fault we weren't rescued the last time. SKIPPER Well let's go! CUT TO: EXT - CLEARING - DAY Gilligan is seen wearing the jetpack getting ready to take off. The skipper, professor and Mary Ann come running from behind him. PROFESSOR Gilligan WAIT! GILLIGAN Don't worry professor I haven't forgotten one thing you told me about the jetpack not one single solitary thing. Gilligan activates the jetpack which promptly launches itself into the sky. Gilligan is left standing in the clearing with everyone else looking on. GILLIGAN Except to buckle it on! SKIPPER Nice going Gilligan! GILLIGAN Skipper give me a boost! Gilligan is going to attempt reaching up to get the already departed jetpack. SKIPPER Yeah sure Gilligan. Give you a boost! I'll give you a boost! Skipper is about to clobber Gilligan when we... FADE OUT: END CREDITS