Gilligan’s Island Transcript
Episode #43, “Castaways Pictures Presents”

The castaways find two crates of silent film equipment in a sunken boat in the lagoon. The Professor suggests making a film telling their story, sending it out on a raft, and hoping for rescue.

“Castaways Pictures Presents”

By

Herbert Finn

and

Alan Dinehart

November 4, 1965

TEASER

FADE IN:

EXT. LAGOON BEACH - DAY

Gilligan paddles a raft from the middle of the lagoon to shore. He steps off the raft and uses a rope to pull the raft further up on shore. Gilligan yells for the Skipper and Professor.

GILLIGAN

Skipper! Professor, I saw a ship! Where is everybody?

SKIPPER AND PROFESSOR

walk through the jungle. Skipper carries a milkmaid's yoke with a pail attached to either end. Professor carries a similar milkmaid's yoke.

GILLIGAN (O.S.)

Skipper, Professor, I saw a ship!

PROFESSOR

Who's that, Gilligan? What's he yelling about now?

They stop.

SKIPPER

I don't know, Professor. Something about he saw a ship or--Saw a ship? Gilligan saw a ship, Professor! Gilligan saw a ship!

Professor removes his milkmaid's yoke and places it carefully on the ground. Skipper runs between two trees, which break off the ends of the milkmaid's yoke. Skipper removes the yoke, which knocks his cap off his head.

FADE OUT

END OF TEASER

ACT ONE

FADE IN:

EXT. LAGOON BEACH - DAY

Professor and Skipper run out from the jungle and onto the lagoon beach.

GILLIGAN (O.S.)

Come on, come on, come on!

PAN ON

Professor as he runs to Gilligan. Skipper catches up. The three men look out into the lagoon.

GILLIGAN

Come over here. Look!

PROFESSOR, SKIPPER, GILLIGAN

stand on the beach and look for the ship.

SKIPPER

Where is it, Gilligan, where?

GILLIGAN

It's right out there. I saw it, plain as day.

PROFESSOR

Out where, Gilligan? I don't see anything.

LAGOON

GILLIGAN (O.S.)

You're not looking in the right place. Look a little bit more over there, see?

PROFESSOR, SKIPPER, GILLIGAN

scan the lagoon for any sign of a ship.

SKIPPER

Yeah, how big was it? How many people were on it?

GILLIGAN

There was nobody on it. It's an abandoned ship.

PROFESSOR

Abandoned? Gilligan, where exactly did you see this ship?

GILLIGAN

Well, you see, it's right out there.

(points)

You look over to the left, and now straight down.

PROFESSOR

Straight down?

SKIPPER

Gilligan, you mean you saw a sunken ship? Oh, Gilligan.

PROFESSOR

Well, now, listen, Gilligan, how far down was she? I mean, how many feet?

GILLIGAN

Oh, Professor, in Navy circles, we don't say "feet," we say "fathoms."

PROFESSOR

All right, how many fathoms?

GILLIGAN

I don't know, about fifteen feet.

PROFESSOR

Well, Skipper, she's not too badly damaged. We might be able to raise her.

SKIPPER AND GILLIGAN

SKIPPER

Sure, and sail her back to the mainland.

GILLIGAN

It ought to be real easy. She only has a hole in her the size of a ten-pound rutabaga.

SKIPPER

A ten-pound what?

GILLIGAN

It's kind of like a turnip, Skipper. You slice it up and put onions and butter and put it in frying pan.

SKIPPER

Oh, never mind.

GILLIGAN

My Aunt Martha can make a rutabaga. Slice it up and--

SKIPPER

Gilligan, we're not here to hear about a recipe. For goodness sakes, we've got to check out this hull.

PROFESSOR

PROFESSOR

Yes, Gilligan, your discovery of this submerged vessel may well be instrumental in securing for us deliverance from our enforced isolation.

PROFESSOR, SKIPPER, AND GILLIGAN

GILLIGAN

Yeah, not only that--

(to Skipper)

What did he say?

Skipper and Gilligan look at Professor. Professor looks at the lagoon.

DISSOLVE TO:

EXT. LAGOON - DAY

Gilligan and Professor sit on the raft.

PROFESSOR

Good thing the water's so clear. It makes the job of salvaging that much easier.

GILLIGAN

He's coming up.

Skipper, wearing goggles, emerges from the lagoon depths. Skipper raises the goggles to his forehead.

PROFESSOR

Yeah. Well, Skipper, what do you think?

SKIPPER

holds on to the side of the raft.

SKIPPER

Gilligan's right, Professor. There's a big hole in the port side. But the starboard side is ...

GILLIGAN AND PROFESSOR

SKIPPER (cont'd)

... the bigger problem.

GILLIGAN

What's that?

SKIPPER

SKIPPER

Well, there isn't any starboard side.

GILLIGAN AND PROFESSOR

PROFESSOR

Dear, that makes salvaging out of the question.

SKIPPER

SKIPPER

I'm afraid so. But while I was down there, I looked into the hold. There's a couple of big boxes that maybe we can salvage.

GILLIGAN AND PROFESSOR

GILLIGAN

Oh, let's get them up, Skipper. There might be something good in there, like, you know, T.V., radio, comic books.

SKIPPER

SKIPPER

Professor, isn't there something you can do with this guy?

GILLIGAN AND PROFESSOR

PROFESSOR

Oh, please, fellas. You know, there just may be something in those boxes we can use to help get ourselves off this island. We'll start salvaging operations in the morning. You've done a wonderful job, Skipper. Come on.

SKIPPER

PROFESSOR (O.S.)

Up in the raft.

SKIPPER

Thanks, Professor.

BACK TO SCENE

SKIPPER (cont'd)

Well, Gilligan, give me a hand.

Gilligan claps.

DISSOLVE TO:

EXT. CAMP - DAY

Skipper stands in boxers and T-shirt. Skipper tugs at the dry suit, trying to get it on. Professor and Gilligan watch Skipper struggle.

SKIPPER

I think I'm going to need a little help, Professor.

PROFESSOR

All right, I'll take the back. Gilligan, you take the front.

GILLIGAN

Right.

Professor tugs at the back of the dry suit. Gilligan tugs at the front. Skipper tugs on the sides. All three pull without success.

GILLIGAN (cont'd)

Skipper, could you kind of push your chest back into position?

SKIPPER

My chest?

Gilligan points to Skipper's belly.

GILLIGAN

This part of it.

SKIPPER

Very funny.

PROFESSOR

Well, you are a little overweight, Skipper.

SKIPPER

I'm not overweight. I just have big bones.

GILLIGAN

And they're covered with big meat.

SKIPPER

Gilligan.

PROFESSOR

Oh, it's no use. I couldn't get into this suit either.

GILLIGAN

I can.

SKIPPER

I don't think we have any choice.

PROFESSOR

I think you're right, Skipper. Take it off. We'll put it on to Gilligan.

The three struggle to remove the dry suit from Skipper.

GILLIGAN

Oh, it's just as fat going down as it was coming up.

They finally succeed in removing the dry suit to Skipper's ankles.

DISSOLVE TO:

EXT. LAGOON BEACH - DAY

Gilligan, wearing the dry suit, walks by Ginger, Mary Ann, and Mrs. Howell. Professor follows him, but stops at the girls. Mary Ann sits on a stationary bicycle that powers a makeshift air pump.

PROFESSOR

Now, remember, ladies, each of you has a job to do.

GINGER, MARY ANN, MRS. HOWELL, PROFESSOR

faces the girls.

PROFESSOR (cont'd)

Mary Ann, you'll do the pumping that generates the air.

MARY ANN

Right.

PROFESSOR

Ginger, keep your eye on the airlines. Make sure they don't get tangled.

GINGER

Right.

PROFESSOR

And Missus Howell.

MRS HOWELL

Right.

PROFESSOR

PROFESSOR

I didn't say anything yet.

GINGER, MARY ANN, MRS. HOWELL

look at Professor.

SKIPPER AND GILLIGAN

Skipper hides behind greenery. Gilligan tries to coax him out of hiding.

GILLIGAN

Come on, Skipper.

SKIPPER

No, Gilligan.

GILLIGAN

Oh, come on.

SKIPPER

Gilligan, I've changed my mind.

GILLIGAN

Oh, you're being silly.

SKIPPER

Gilligan, no. And that's final.

GILLIGAN

Hey, Professor, see what you can do, huh?

Professor enters.

PROFESSOR

Skipper, we've got to do this in the warmest part of the day, and that's right now. Come on.

NEW ANGLE

SKIPPER

Oh, all right.

Skipper emerges. He's wearing long john underwear and his cap.

SKIPPER (cont'd)

If anybody laughs, I'm going to quit.

PROFESSOR

Now, now, Skipper, this is a very important task we're undertaking, and you're going to need those longies for warmth.

GILLIGAN

Don't forget, it's cold down there, and keep your flap closed.

SKIPPER

You keep your flap closed, Gilligan, or I'll close it for you.

MARY ANN, MRS. HOWELL, AND GINGER

Mary Ann hides her eyes. Professor escorts Skipper and Gilligan to the raft.

MRS HOWELL

Don't look, Mary Ann.

Mary Ann peeks and giggles.

SKIPPER

Hello, ladies.

Skipper turns so his backside is away from the girls.

PROFESSOR

Mister Howell.

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

Yes.

PROFESSOR

You take one air line, and I'll take the other.

Mr. Howell stands on the raft. He wears a white captain's cap and a uniform coat.

MR HOWELL

Roger.

SKIPPER

Mister Howell, that's Air Force talk, not Navy.

MR. HOWELL

MR HOWELL

Talk to me about Navy. I'm more at home on a boat than anyone else. Well, I think I'll go aft.

BACK TO SCENE

Mr. Howell steps off the raft into the lagoon. He loses his white cap. He pops up out of the water.

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

Oh! I've been scuttled.

FLIP TO:

EXT. LAGOON - DAY

Wet Mr. Howell sits on a box on the raft. Professor kneels on the raft. Skipper and Gilligan float in the water next to the raft.

PROFESSOR

If you're not getting a steady flow of air. I want you to surface.

GILLIGAN AND SKIPPER

float in the water.

SKIPPER

You can count on that, Professor.

MR. HOWELL AND PROFESSOR

MR HOWELL

The girls are willing and ready to go, Professor.

PROFESSOR

(yells)

All right, Mary Ann!

MARY ANN, MRS. HOWELL, AND GINGER

PROFESSOR (cont'd)

(yells)

Start pumping!

GINGER

Start pumping, Mary Ann.

MR HOWELL AND PROFESSOR

PROFESSOR

Now, I want you to test your air line, Gilligan.

Professor hands an air line to Skipper.

PROFESSOR (cont'd)

Test yours, Skipper. It comes in the back of your suit and goes to your mouthpiece.

GILLIGAN AND SKIPPER

test their air lines.

PROFESSOR (O.S.)

See if you're getting air.

Gilligan and Skipper nod.

PROFESSOR (O.S.) (cont'd)

Good.

MR. HOWELL AND PROFESSOR

PROFESSOR

All right, submerge.

GILLIGAN AND SKIPPER

sink into the lagoon. Air bubbles stream up to the surface.

MR. HOWELL AND PROFESSOR

both feed air lines carefully so they don't get tangled or caught.

MR HOWELL

Marvelous.

SURFACE OF THE LAGOON

Bubbles stream up to the surface.

MARY ANN, MRS. HOWELL AND GINGER

Mary Ann pedals to pump air. Ginger holds the air line.

ZOOM TO AIR PUMP

working.

MR. HOWELL AND PROFESSOR

PROFESSOR

Now, Mister Howell, you keep your eye on Gilligan's airline.

MR HOWELL

I'll give it my undivided attention. I just hope we finish before cocktail time.

PROFESSOR

Just make sure that line doesn't get tangled.

SURFACE OF THE LAGOON

Bubbles stream up to the surface.

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

Well, I've had a lot of experience in scuba ...

MR. HOWELL AND PROFESSOR

MR HOWELL

... diving in my pool.

PROFESSOR

Must be a very large pool.

MR HOWELL

Large? Last year we had a hurricane, Emma, of course. A couple of Japanese fishermen, and the salmon were at the diving board to spawn.

MR. HOWELL, PROFESSOR, AND GILLIGAN

Gilligan's dry suit has inflated so Gilligan floats on the surface of the water.

GILLIGAN

Help.

PROFESSOR

Gilligan, good heavens.

MR HOWELL

This is no time time for pranks!

GILLIGAN

floats on the lagoon surface in his dry suit.

GILLIGAN

Help! Help!

MR. HOWELL, PROFESSOR, AND GILLIGAN

PROFESSOR

There must be a leak with the air line.

MR HOWELL

Wait a minute, I know how to remedy this, Professor, hold on.

Mr. Howell takes a sharp object and pierces Gilligan's dry suit.

WIDER SHOT

Gilligan shoots away from the raft and travels to the other side of the lagoon.

DISSOLVE TO:

EXT. CAMP - DAY

Gilligan helps Professor tear off a protective wrap on a crate. Ginger, Mr. Howell, Mrs. Howell, and Mary Ann unwrap another crate. Skipper asks Gilligan to assist them.

SKIPPER

Never mind that, Gilligan. Go over and help the girls.

Gilligan moves to assist the other castaways.

MRS HOWELL

Yeah, okay, just a second.

Ginger works a crowbar to loosen the top of a crate.

MR HOWELL

Yes, yeah, let's go over here. Skipper, give the heave job. There we go.

FOLLOW GILLIGAN

as he crosses from one crate to the other. Skipper helps Professor open the first crate with claw hammers. They remove the top of the crate. Gilligan takes the crowbar from Ginger and works the crowbar on the second crate.

MARY ANN

You're getting it.

Gilligan drops the crowbar and opens the second crate. They look inside.

MARY ANN (cont'd)

Oh!

GILLIGAN

A crate full of crazy costumes.

GINGER

Look. Oh, imagine this!

Ginger removes a dress.

MARY ANN

Isn't this the end?

Mary Ann removes a feather boa. Gilligan removes a cane.

SKIPPER, MR. HOWELL, MRS. HOWELL, PROFESSOR

examine the crate's contents.

PROFESSOR

Look, a camera. It's a motion picture camera!

Professor sets down his pick ax and removes the camera from the crate. He looks through the viewfinder. Skipper puts his hammer down and then picks up a box of film.

SKIPPER

Oh, and here's some film to go with that camera, Professor. Oh, look, there's a name on the side. "South Sea Film Productions."

ZOOM TO MR. HOWELL AND MRS. HOWELL

MR HOWELL

South Sea Film Productions? Wasn't that the company formed by Fifi LaFrance, the famous movie vamp?

MRS HOWELL

Yes, with her husband, Ricardo, Laughingwell.

MR HOWELL

Oh, a handsome chap with a mustache. Ricardo, I mean, though Fifi had a bit of one herself.

MRS HOWELL

It all comes back to me now. Fifi and Ricardo were married and sailed away on their honeymoon to make a picture together. Oh, it was so romantic.

MR HOWELL

Not a bad tax dodge, either.

PROFESSOR AND SKIPPER

PROFESSOR

It must be their old abandoned yacht, and this is silent picture equipment.

MR. HOWELL AND MRS. HOWELL

MRS HOWELL

I just love those old silent pictures and those marvelous silent picture stars. Oh, look, darling, there's Thede Bara.

GINGER

dressed in a brunette wig, a white and black stole, a silver dress, and carries a cigarette holder.

PAN TO MARY ANN

Mary Ann wears a blonde wig with ringlet curls and blue ribbons. Her dress is a short white dress.

MRS HOWELL (O.S.)

And there's little Mary Pickford.

PAN TO GILLIGAN

dressed in a Arabian nights outfit.

MRS HOWELL (O.S.) (cont'd)

And Rudolph Valentino.

FOLLOW GILLIGAN TO PROFESSOR AND SKIPPER

as he moves past Mary Ann to Ginger. Ginger unfurls her white stole while Gilligan does a quick change into Charlie Chaplin's The Little Tramp. Gilligan emerges from behind Ginger in a bowler hat, a cane, white shirt, tuxedo coat with tails, a tiny mustache, and brown trousers. Gilligan spins the cane and taps Mr. Howell in the belly.

MR HOWELL

Oh!

MRS HOWELL

Oh!

GILLIGAN

Hey, Skipper, we can have some fun with these costumes.

SKIPPER

Certainly we can have fun, Gilligan, but we're not here for fun. We're here to get off the island. It's just too bad we couldn't have found something we could use.

PROFESSOR

Well, perhaps we have, Skipper.

SKIPPER

Huh?

PROFESSOR

Listen, I have an idea how we can use this equipment to get ourselves rescued.

SKIPPER

Rescued?

PROFESSOR

Yes, now listen, if you'll all gather around, let me try to explain this.

FADE OUT

END OF ACT ONE

ACT TWO

FADE IN:

EXT. GILLIGAN'S ISLAND - ESTABLISHING SHOT - DAY

EXT. LAGOON - DAY

Skipper emerges from the lagoon carrying Gilligan. Both wear pancake makeup reminiscent of the silent film era.

PULL BACK TO REVEAL

Mr. Howell, the director, gives instructions through a megaphone. Professor operates the camera. Mrs. Howell lies on the beach. Mary Ann sits next to Mrs. Howell and waves. Ginger stands and waves.

MR HOWELL

Watch your makeup. Don't get it wet. Very important. The dry makeup is a good makeup. That's it. Splendid. Splendid job of acting, Skipper.

PROFESSOR

Keep your face more toward camera.

GILLIGAN AND SKIPPER

Skipper carries Gilligan.

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

That's right.

SKIPPER

I don't think this is gonna help us get rescued at all.

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

Leave the thinking to ...

MR. HOWELL AND PROFESSOR

MR HOWELL

... Cecil B. Howell, will you?

PROFESSOR

I told you, Skipper, this movie will show how we got shipwrecked on the island.

GILLIGAN AND SKIPPER

PROFESSOR (O.S.)

We'll put the film on a raft. When people find it, they'll see us ...

MR. HOWELL AND PROFESSOR

PROFESSOR

... stranded here on the island and they'll send help.

MR HOWELL

We'll release it as a feature. We'll all make millions.

BACK TO SCENE

Ginger and Mary Ann wave toward the camera.

PROFESSOR

It'll work, Skipper. Believe me, it will.

SKIPPER

Well, I hope so, because this acting business is really exhausting.

GILLIGAN

Well, if you're tired, why don't you put me down?

SKIPPER

Gilligan, I'll put you down.

FOLLOW SKIPPER

as he walks to the water and tosses Gilligan into the water.

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

That's not in the script!

FLIP TO:

EXT. CAMP - DAY

MR. HOWELL AND GILLIGAN

MR HOWELL

Now, remember, Gilligan, while the Professor's emoting on the silver screen, you are the cameraman.

GILLIGAN

Right. Anytime you're ready, C.B.

MR HOWELL

Eyes and ears of the world, you understand?

FOLLOW MR. HOWELL

to Ginger and Professor.

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

Now, in this scene, Ginger, the Professor has told you about his plan to make the movie so we can all be rescued from the island without any gratitude. You understand, girl?

GINGER

Yes, sir.

(to Gilligan)

Don't forget to photograph me from the left, Gilligan.

GILLIGAN

GILLIGAN

Right. I mean left. That's right. Left. Right?

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

And, Gilligan, will you stop the marching?

PROFESSOR, GINGER, AND MR. HOWELL

MR HOWELL

All right, will you please make your entrance from the hibiscus bush, and, uh, Professor, I mean, anytime you're ready, rock, baby.

Ginger exits to the hibiscus bush. Professor sits down at the dining table.

PROFESSOR

Rock, baby?

Professor stands.

MR HOWELL

Showbiz talk.

PROFESSOR

Oh.

MR HOWELL

Understand, pussycat?

Professor sits down at the dining table.

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

Ready up there!

FOLLOW

Mr. Howell returns to his Director chair.

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

Quiet! Quiet up there, you birds! Lights! Action! Camera! Action!

Ginger enters quickly.

GINGER

Oh, there you are, Professor.

Professor stands up, but knocks over his chair. Mr. Howell approaches Professor and Ginger.

MR HOWELL

Stop! Cut! Son, you look so stupid!

PROFESSOR, GINGER, MR. HOWELL

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

Can't you just stand up? You do it every day of your life.

PROFESSOR

But, Mister Howell, the chair--

MR HOWELL

You're not playing a scene with a chair. You're playing a scene with Ginger. Do you understand?

PROFESSOR

Yes, yes.

MR HOWELL

I know you do. All right. Back in the bushes, my dear, and, uh--

Ginger exits to her position at the hibiscus bush.

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

Remember the signal, okay? And, uh, action.

MR. HOWELL

returns to his chair.

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

From the top, as we say. All right. Camera.

BACK TO SCENE

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

Action!

Ginger runs to Professor.

GINGER

Oh, there you are, Professor.

He stands.

PROFESSOR

Ginger.

GINGER

Oh, Professor, you're a genius.

PROFESSOR AND GINGER

PROFESSOR

(stilted)

I do have a rather high I.Q.

GINGER

But this whole rescue plan was your idea.

PROFESSOR

(stilted)

Necessity is the mother of invention.

MR. HOWELL

watches their performance.

GINGER (O.S.)

Oh, there must be some way I can thank you.

GILLIGAN

cranks the camera and peers through the viewfinder.

PROFESSOR (O.S.)

(stilted)

No thanks are necessary.

Gilligan looks over the top of the camera.

GINGER

But there must be some way I can thank you.

PROFESSOR AND GINGER

PROFESSOR

(stilted)

Well, if you insist, the customary way will do.

Professor stiffly extends his hand for Ginger to shake.

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

Cut!

GILLIGAN AND MR. HOWELL

MR HOWELL

Cut!

BACK TO SCENE

Mr. Howell walks over to Professor and Ginger.

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

Son, you don't show gratitude on the ...

PROFESSOR, GINGER, AND MR. HOWELL

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

... silver screen by shaking hands. You give a kiss. Do you understand?

PROFESSOR

Oh.

MR HOWELL

A real, real kiss.

PROFESSOR

Oh.

MR HOWELL

All right, now, pick it up two lines before the gratitude stick.

GINGER

But there must be...

MR HOWELL

Hey! Wait till the director says "action."

GINGER

Yes, sir.

MR HOWELL

All right. Quiet up there, birds. All right.

GILLIGAN

operates the camera. Mr. Howell sits down in his Director's chair. Gilligan cranks the camera.

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

All right. Quiet up there. Action.

PROFESSOR AND GINGER

GINGER

But there must be some way I can thank you.

PROFESSOR

(stilted)

Well, if you insist, the customary way will do.

Ginger leans in for a kiss. Professor turns his cheek toward her.

BACK TO SCENE

MR HOWELL

Cut!

Gilligan stops cranking the camera.

PROFESSOR

What is the matter now?

MR HOWELL

You're turning your stupid head, don't you understand?

PROFESSOR, GINGER, AND MR. HOWELL

PROFESSOR

Well, kissing on the mouth is far from sanitary, and it can lead to all sorts of bacterial transfers.

GINGER

Certainly make a kiss sound romantic, like germ warfare.

MR HOWELL

Will you forget the science, Professor, and give her a real kiss? All right, now, pick it up once again from the gratitude shtick. Two lines before.

GINGER

But there must be some...

MR HOWELL

(yells)

Ginger!

(calmly)

You mustn't talk before I say "action."

GINGER

Sorry, sir.

MR HOWELL

I know. You're learning.

BACK TO SCENE

MR. HOWELL

Ready? Quiet up there, you birds. Ready?

Gilligan cranks the camera.

GILLIGAN AND MR. HOWELL

MR HOWELL

Action.

PROFESSOR AND GINGER

GINGER

But there must be some way I can thank you.

PROFESSOR

(stilted)

Well, if you insist.

Ginger leans in and kisses Professor. Professor wraps his arms around Ginger. She wraps her arms around him.

GILLIGAN AND MR. HOWELL

Gilligan cranks the camera and Mr. Howell watches the action.

PROFESSOR AND GINGER

Ginger continues kissing Professor and dips him over the dining table. They adjust their hands awkwardly.

GILLIGAN

stares, mesmerized. He stops cranking the camera to stare at them kissing.

MR. HOWELL

watches, intrigued by the depth and length of the kiss.

PROFESSOR AND GINGER

continue kissing. They rearrange their arms.

GILLIGAN AND MR. HOWELL

Gilligan steps in front of the camera to watch their kiss. Mr. Howell stands up.

PROFESSOR AND GINGER

continue to kiss. They adjust their arms.

GILLIGAN AND MR. HOWELL

GILLIGAN

Wow, that sure is some kiss.

MR HOWELL

It's a doozy, it's a--

(notices Gilligan is not operating the camera)

Gilligan, why aren't you working the camera?

Gilligan returns to operate the camera and cranks it. Mr. Howell sits down.

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

No germ could live through that kiss.

GILLIGAN

They're going to break the world kissing record.

MR HOWELL

World kissing record?

GILLIGAN

Yeah, held by Skinny Mulligan and Florence Oppenheimer. Six hours, twelve minutes, and thirteen seconds.

MR HOWELL

Well, how could anyone possibly kiss that long?

GILLIGAN

Oh, it's easy. They were chewing bubble gum and their braces locked.

FLIP TO:

EXT. CAMP - DAY

Mr. Howell discusses the scene with Mary Ann.

MR HOWELL

Now, in this scene, Mary Ann, I want to show the everyday dangers that we face here on the island. Are you ready?

MARY ANN

Oh, right, Mister Howell. I come down the path, the cannibal ties me to the stake, he scares me, and I plead for my life.

MR HOWELL

You're going to be marvelous. All right, back there.

Mr. Howell walks over to Gilligan dressed as a cannibal.

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

And it's a check over here. Are you ready, cannibal?

GILLIGAN

Boola boola boola!

PULL BACK TO SCENE

MR HOWELL

Boola boola boola? Method actors, I tell you never again.

Mr. Howell sits down in his director's chair.

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

All right, camera, lights, quiet up there, and let's have action. Action.

Mary Ann mimes gathering nuts from non-existent plants.

MARY ANN

Here I go gathering nuts in May, nuts in May.

GILLIGAN

Boo!

Mr. Howell taps the Professor to stop filming.

MR HOWELL

Cut! What is this "boo" shtick? You're a--you're a crazed savage.

MR. HOWELL, GILLIGAN, AND MARY ANN

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

You're terrifying, a real geschrei. Now, back to your respective--

They return to their positions.

BACK TO SCENE

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

That's it. Ready? Lights, camera, action.

Mary Ann mimes gathering nuts from non-existent plants.

MARY ANN

Here I go gathering nuts in May, nuts in May.

Gilligan appears on cue to scare Mary Ann.

GILLIGAN

Blah!

MARY ANN

Ah!

Mary Ann drops her basket. Pieces of fruit roll out of it.

GILLIGAN

Oh.

Gilligan bends over and kneels down to pick up the fruit.

MR HOWELL

Gilligan, my boy, ...

GILLIGAN

picks up fruit and puts it in the basket.

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

... forget the fruit.

GILLIGAN

But it's our dessert.

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

You scare, you scream, gesch--Aah!

MR. HOWELL AND PROFESSOR

Professor cranks the camera while Mr. Howell emotes.

GILLIGAN AND MARY ANN

GILLIGAN

Aaa.

MARY ANN

Oh, oh!

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

No, no, no, no, ...

MR. HOWELL AND PROFESSOR

MR HOWELL

... menace her, menace her, boy.

GILLIGAN AND MARY ANN

MARY ANN

Menace me, Gilligan.

Mary Ann elbows Gilligan.

MARY ANN (cont'd)

Oh, oh!

GILLIGAN

You're going to be burned at the stake, and smoke will get in your eyes and everything.

Gilligan turns to Mr. Howell and smiles. Mary Ann looks at Gilligan, puzzled.

MR. HOWELL AND PROFESSOR

Mr. Howell looks at Professor.

MR HOWELL

Stake her. What a frightening actor.

BACK TO SCENE

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

Now, don't stand there, tire her to the stake. That's it.

Mary Ann stands next to the stake. Gilligan wraps a rope around her hips and torso.

MARY ANN

Oh, kind sir, you have such a kind face. How can I talk you out of doing this horrible deed? Oh, do not harm me, cannibal.

GILLIGAN AND MARY ANN

Gilligan completes tying Mary Ann to the stake, but sways in dizziness.

MR. HOWELL AND PROFESSOR

MR HOWELL

Now, do your dance. The dance of death.

BACK TO SCENE

Gilligan performs the "dance of death."

GILLIGAN

Ah!

MR. HOWELL AND PROFESSOR

MR HOWELL

I'm going to kill him.

PROFESSOR

Just be grateful it's a silent picture.

GILLIGAN AND MARY ANN

Gilligan walks around Mary Ann, swinging his arms wildly until he's out of breath. Mary Ann taps him on the shoulder. He turns to Mary Ann, sees her, screams, and flees into the jungle.

GILLIGAN

Ah!

Mary Ann looks to Mr. Howell.

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

Cut!

FLIP TO:

EXT. CAMP - DAY

Skipper and Mr. Howell stand in front of a slate chalkboard on an easel. Skipper has white pancake makeup applied. On the chalkboard is an outline of the continental United States. To the lower left are four circles that represent Hawaii.

MR HOWELL

Now, I repeat, this is the most important scene in the picture. The picture means nothing unless the scene has great impact. It must have motivation. It must have precise timing. It must have dignity.

SKIPPER

Oh, never mind all that static, Mister Howell. All I want to do is show the approximate location of our island.

MR HOWELL

Actors, temperamental children. All right, get ready.

Gilligan enters and stands in front of the slate chalkboard.

SKIPPER

I've been ready for a half an hour.

MR HOWELL

(to Gilligan)

Just what do you think you're doing?

SKIPPER AND GILLIGAN

GILLIGAN

I'm just standing.

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

Well, will you stand someplace else? Get out.

Gilligan exits.

SKIPPER

You can't talk to my little buddy like that.

PROFESSOR AND MR. HOWELL

MR HOWELL

I'm the director. I'll talk to anyone that I please.

BACK TO SCENE

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

All right, be ready, cameraman, as we say. Camera, roll them, action.

Skipper points to Hawaii on the slate chalkboard.

SKIPPER

This is Hawaii.

MR HOWELL

Cut! Cut, cut, cut, cut. You've got to show emotion.

PROFESSOR AND MR. HOWELL

MR HOWELL (cont'd)

Joy of the impending voyage. You don't know we're going to have a terrible storm and a shipwreck. All right, now. Play it again. Camera, ...

SKIPPER

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

... lights, action.

Skipper points to Hawaii on the slate chalkboard.

SKIPPER

This is Hawaii. We started to drift southeast, and then the storm hit.

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

Wait a minute!

PROFESSOR AND MR. HOWELL

Mr. Howell rises from his director chair.

SKIPPER AND MR. HOWELL

MR HOWELL

If you want people to find us, you've got to give them a universal starting point, like Fort Knox.

Mr. Howell draws an "X" somewhat in the middle of the United States.

SKIPPER

Fort Knox?

MR HOWELL

That's the only shrine my friends know, Fort Knox.

PROFESSOR (O.S.)

Mister Howell, ...

PROFESSOR

cranks the camera.

PROFESSOR

... we are wasting film.

SKIPPER, MR. HOWELL, AND PROFESSOR

MR HOWELL

You're so right, keep rolling, keep rolling.

Mr. Howell returns to his director chair. Ginger enters.

GINGER

If you want a landmark, Hollywood is here.

Ginger draws an "X" approximately where Hollywood is. Mr. Howell rises from his director chair.

SKIPPER, MR. HOWELL, AND GINGER

MR HOWELL

Hollywood?

GINGER

For ten percent, my agent will swim down here personally.

Mary Ann enters.

MARY ANN

We've got to start with the nation's capital, Washington, D.C.

Mary Ann draws an "X" approximately where Washington, D.C. is.

MR HOWELL

Washington, D.C.? I'm a Republican. No one will ever find me there.

SKIPPER

Mister Howell, if you'll just listen to me, we started from Hawaii. That's the best place to find us.

GINGER

If Lana Turner was discovered in a soda fountain, I can be discovered here.

PROFESSOR

PROFESSOR

Gilligan, operate this camera.

BACK TO SCENE

PROFESSOR (cont'd)

Now, listen.

Mrs. Howell enters. Gilligan pans the camera to follow her.

MRS HOWELL

Gilligan, point the camera this way, please. I want to send a few pictures to Princess Grace. Hello, Prince Rainier and all you darling children.

PROFESSOR (O.S.)

Gilligan, you turn that camera right back here.

Gilligan turns the camera back toward the slate chalkboard.

MR HOWELL

Right back here.

PROFESSOR

Now, starting with Peru--

MR HOWELL

Fort Knox, you go west. Denver men, then the San Francisco men.

SKIPPER

Why don't you stop and listen to me?

As Gilligan cranks the camera, the tripod's legs spread, lowering the camera to the ground. The castaways sink to keep themselves in frame. Gilligan swats while he cranks the camera until it stops on the ground.

FADE OUT

END OF ACT TWO

ACT THREE

FADE IN:

EXT. CAMP - NIGHT

Professor stands in front of a film projector. Gilligan sits on the stationary cycle, ready to pedal to provide power to the projector. The other castaways, turned to Professor, sit facing the projection screen.

PROFESSOR

Now, before we roll the film, I'd like to explain something.

MRS. HOWELL, GINGER, MARY ANN, MR. HOWELL

MR HOWELL

Never mind the explanation. Just ...

PROFESSOR

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

...get on with the film.

PROFESSOR

Please, Mister Howell.

MRS. HOWELL, GINGER, MARY ANN, MR. HOWELL

GINGER

I've heard of having previews in out-of-the-way places, but this is ridiculous.

SKIPPER

SKIPPER

Oh, now, come on. Quiet, everybody. Now, you go ahead, Professor.

PROFESSOR

PROFESSOR

Well, in the processing of this film, I encountered what you might call a few technical difficulties.

MRS. HOWELL, GINGER, MARY ANN, MR. HOWELL

MRS HOWELL

Technical difficulties?

GILLIGAN

GILLIGAN

He means me.

PROFESSOR, MRS. HOWELL, GINGER, MARY ANN, MR. HOWELL

Mrs. Howell smiles.

PROFESSOR

Now, just remember that the main object of this film is to get ourselves rescued, and that is its only purpose.

PROFESSOR

PROFESSOR (cont'd)

So if the quality of the film from time to time appears to be inferior, it's just that--

MRS. HOWELL, GINGER, MARY ANN, MR. HOWELL

MR HOWELL

Never mind that. I can't stand late curtains or talky projectionists.

BACK TO SCENE

PROFESSOR

All right, Gilligan, start pumping the projector.

Gilligan pedals and the screen illuminates bright white.

MR HOWELL

Noisy projectionists.

On the screen "CASTAWAY PICTURES Presents" title card.

SCREEN WITH TITLE CARD

on a gong suspended from bamboo scaffolding. Pull back to Gilligan, in slow-mo, swinging a mallet toward the gong. Gilligan wears no shirt, but a hat and slacks. The mallet strikes the gong with a CLANK. Gilligan vibrates his whole body so his hat falls off.

GILLIGAN

pedals and smiles.

PROFESSOR, SKIPPER, MR. HOWELL, MRS. HOWELL, GINGER AND MARY ANN

watch the screen. The projector flickers.

DIARY ON SCREEN

sits on a table. A hand opens the diary. With pencil in hand, it writes "This is our story". The hand turns the page. The hand writes "HELP!"

BACK TO SCENE

They view "HELP!" on the diary page.

PROFESSOR

That should get our message across.

MR. HOWELL AND MRS. HOWELL

MR HOWELL

Well already you've goofed. Message pictures don't make any money.

GILLIGAN'S ISLAND ON SCREEN

MARY ANN (O.S.)

Oh, isn't that our island?

SKIPPER (O.S.)

Yes.

SKIPPER

SKIPPER

Now, if some sailor recognizes that, we'll be found. We'll be rescued.

GINGER AND MARY ANN

GINGER

Oh, after all these months, I don't know if I'd recognize a sailor.

GILLIGAN

pedals.

GILLIGAN

Hey, Skipper, here comes the part where you rescue everybody.

DIARY ON SCREEN

The hand writes "The Shipwreck" and underlines it with a fancy swish.

SKIPPER (O.S.)

Quiet, everybody, quiet!

SKIPPER CARRIES GINGER FROM LAGOON

Skipper carries Ginger ashore and places her next to Mary Ann.

GINGER (O.S.)

Oh, that's me. That's us, Skipper.

GINGER AND MARY ANN

Ginger claps.

SKIPPER

smiles.

MARY ANN, GINGER, AND SKIPPER ON SCREEN

Skipper returns to the lagoon. He hoists Gilligan into his arms.

SKIPPER AND GILLIGAN INVERTED ON SCREEN

SKIPPER (O.S.)

What happened?

PROFESSOR, SKIPPER, MR. HOWELL, MRS. HOWELL, GINGER, AND MARY ANN

tilt their heads to watch the upside-down picture.

PROFESSOR

Oh, technical difficulties, Skipper.

SKIPPER

I'm walking on my head.

GILLIGAN AND SKIPPER INVERTED ON SCREEN

GILLIGAN

GILLIGAN

Hey, that's great, Skipper. I never even saw that in "The Ed Sullivan Show."

GILLIGAN AND SKIPPER INVERTED ON SCREEN

GILLIGAN AND SKIPPER ON SCREEN

Skipper walks to the lagoon and tosses Gilligan into the water. The film reverses three times and then continues.

GINGER ON SCREEN

runs in slow motion to Professor, who sits at the dining table. Ginger throws her arms around him. Professor stands.

BACK TO SCENE

The image of Ginger and Professor appears on the screen as the castaways watch.

GINGER

Why am I moving so slow?

PROFESSOR

Technical problem.

GINGER AND MARY ANN

watch the film.

PROFESSOR AND GINGER ON SCREEN

Professor extends his hand for a handshake. Ginger disappointedly looks into the lens.

MR. HOWELL AND MRS. H0WELL

MR HOWELL

Wait a minute. I didn't say print that.

PROFESSOR AND GINGER

wrap their arms around each other in fast-motion and reposition their arms.

GINGER (O.S.)

Why am I moving so fast?

PROFESSOR (O.S.)

Well, it's a silent picture, Ginger.

GINGER AND MARY ANN

watch the screen. Ginger smiles coyly.

MR. HOWELL AND MRS. HOWELL

MR HOWELL

I don't think you should see this, Lovey. It's for adults. I've never been so--Never get the Legion--

PROFESSOR AND GINGER ON SCREEN

Ginger dips Professor over the dining table and they kiss for an extended time.

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

How'd you learn to hold your breath that long?

PROFESSOR (O.S.)

I used to be a scuba diver.

MR. HOWELL AND MRS. HOWELL

MR HOWELL

Sure it wasn't siphoning gasoline during the war?

PROFESSOR

stands next to the projector.

PROFESSOR AND GINGER ON SCREEN

continue kissing.

MR. HOWELL (O.S.)

Gilligan, I said close-ups. I remember saying distinct, "close-ups"!

GILLIGAN

GILLIGAN

Oh, they're coming up, Mister Howell.

GINGER ON SCREEN

Her face fills the screen.

PROFESSOR ON SCREEN

His face fills the screen.

GINGER ON SCREEN

Her face fills the screen.

PROFESSOR ON SCREEN

His face fills the screen.

GINGER ON SCREEN

Ginger blinks quickly. Then she opens her eyes widely.

PROFESSOR ON SCREEN

Professor raises his eyebrows.

GINGER'S MOUTH AND NOSE ON SCREEN

GINGER'S EYES AND BANGS ON SCREEN

Ginger blinks rapidly.

GINGER'S RIGHT EYE ON SCREEN

Ginger blinks rapidly.

GINGER (O.S.)

Look at it! And that's one eye.

GINGER AND MARY ANN

GINGER

Oh, Gilligan, you ruined the whole scene.

GILLIGAN

pedals.

GILLIGAN

Well, the, uh, the camera was still, but you kept moving.

GINGER AND MARY ANN

watch the screen.

GINGER'S MOUTH AND NOSE ON SCREEN

She moves her lips rapidly in fast-motion.

PROFESSOR'S LEFT EYE ON SCREEN

He moves his lips as if speaking and then opens his eyes widely.

GINGER'S RIGHT EYE ON SCREEN

PROFESSOR'S RIGHT EAR ON SCREEN

SKIPPER (O.S.)

Whose ear is that?

PROFESSOR (O.S.)

I, uh, I think it's mine.

GINGER'S MOUTH ON SCREEN

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

What's that horrible thing?

GILLIGAN (O.S.)

Ginger's mouth.

GINGER (O.S.)

Oh!

GINGER AND MARY ANN

Ginger fumes. Mary Ann cringes.

DOUBLE EXPOSED PROFESSOR'S NOSE AND MOUTH AND GINGER'S RIGHT EYE ON SCREEN

DOUBLE EXPOSED PROFESSOR'S NOSE AND MOUTH AND GINGER'S MOUTH ON SCREEN

DOUBLE EXPOSED GINGER'S NOSE AND MOUTH AND GINGER'S MOUTH ON SCREEN

DOUBLE EXPOSED GINGER'S RIGHT EYE AND THE RIGHT SIDE OF GINGER'S FACE ON SCREEN

DOUBLE EXPOSED PROFESSOR'S RIGHT EYE AND GINGER'S NOSE AND MOUTH ON SCREEN

DOUBLE EXPOSED PROFESSOR'S RIGHT EAR AND GINGER FACE ON SCREEN

MR. HOWELL AND MRS. HOWELL

MR HOWELL

I asked for a love scene, not an anatomy lesson.

GILLIGAN

pedals and shrugs.

GILLIGAN'S RIGHT HAND ON SCREEN

Gilligan extends his finger, points his index finger like a gun, and then extends his fingers.

SKIPPER (O.S.)

What's that?

GILLIGAN

pedals.

GILLIGAN

That's my hand. I got it in front of the camera.

MR. HOWELL AND MRS. HOWELL

MRS HOWELL

Oh, it's really quite difficult to follow the plot.

PROFESSOR

stands next to the projector and watches the film.

PROFESSOR

Well, the plot's not important, Missus Howell. It's the island, the people, and the danger we're in.

GILLIGAN

GILLIGAN

Yeah, like the part that's coming up now where I play a savage cannibal.

MARY ANN ON SCREEN

Mary Ann mimes picking nuts-in-May in fast-motion.

MARY ANN (O.S.)

Oh, and that's my best part.

Gilligan enters as a cannibal. Mary Ann drops the basket of fruit. Gilligan bends down and picks up the fruit and places them into the basket.

PROFESSOR (O.S.)

Yes, unfortunately, it's also the part where Gilligan opened the door to the dark room.

WHITE ON SCREEN

BLINKING ON SCREEN

SKIPPER (O.S.)

What's that?

GILLIGAN AND MARY ANN NEGATIVE IMAGE ON SCREEN

Gilligan says, "boo" and Mary Ann feigns fear.

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

Good heavens. X-rays.

PROFESSOR (O.S.)

Like I said, Mister Howell, ...

MR. HOWELL AND MRS. HOWELL

PROFESSOR (O.S.) (cont'd)

...there are great problems connected with this picture.

MRS HOWELL

It isn't even good enough, you know, for the Late, Late, Late, Late, Late Show.

GILLIGAN AND MARY ANN NEGATIVE IMAGE ON SCREEN

Gilligan moves Mary Ann to the pole and ties her to the stake.

BLINKING ON SCREEN

GILLIGAN AND MARY ANN ON SCREEN

Gilligan ties Mary Ann to the pole.

GINGER AND MARY ANN

Ginger closes her eyes. Mary Ann watches the screen gleefully.

MARY ANN AND GILLIGAN ON SCREEN

Gilligan dances around Mary Ann. The ropes fall off Mary Ann. Gilligan dances around Mary Ann. Mary Ann taps Gilligan on the shoulder. Gilligan screams and flees into the jungle.

SKIPPER ON SCREEN

Skipper points to the slate chalkboard to indicate where the Minnow drifted for days. Mr. Howell enters.

GILLIGAN

Oh, here comes the part now where we show where our island's located.

MR. HOWELL AND MRS. HOWELL

SKIPPER

SKIPPER AND MR. HOWELL ON SCREEN

Mr. Howell rushes back to his director chair. Ginger enters and marks Hollywood on the slate chalkboard. Mr. Howell re-enters. Mary Ann enters. Ginger vamps it up.

PROFESSOR

stands by the projector and watches the film.

SKIPPER, MARY ANN, MR. HOWELL, AND GINGER ON SCREEN

Professor enters.

PAN TO MRS. HOWELL ON SCREEN

MRS HOWELL (O.S.)

Darling, there I am. Look, look at me.

Mrs. Howell throws kisses to the camera.

MR HOWELL (O.S.)

Yes, you look absolutely ravishing.

PAN BACK TO SKIPPER, MARY ANN, PROFESSOR, MR. HOWELL, AND GINGER ON SCREEN

Each of them speak to the camera. They sink to their knees as the camera's tripod sinks.

DIARY

The hand writes "The End".

BACK TO SCENE

"The End" title card projects on-screen.

MR HOWELL

Cut the film!

PROFESSOR

Well, that's the end.

The screen goes dark.

MRS. HOWELL, GINGER, MARY ANN, MR. HOWELL AND SKIPPER

Skipper stands and turns to the projector.

SKIPPER

Boy, that's the end all right.

MARY ANN

Oh, it's awful.

GINGER

It's enough to make a boy and a girl leave a drive-in movie.

MR HOWELL

I'd walk out on that picture even on an airplane.

PROFESSOR (O.S.)

Please, listen everyone, ...

PROFESSOR

PROFESSOR

... the main purpose of this film is to get ourselves rescued.

BACK TO SCENE

SKIPPER

He's right. Now let's get it all nice and wrapped real airtight. We'll put it on a raft and hope somebody finds it.

GILLIGAN

Couldn't we see it again? I love a picture where I know the ending.

Gilligan dismounts the cycle.

MR HOWELL

Take my name off it, that's all right.

FADE OUT

END OF ACT THREE

TAG

FADE IN:

EXT. CAMP - DAY

Skipper sits at the dining table and listens to the radio.

PULL BACK TO REVEAL

Professor, Ginger, Mr. Howell, Mrs. Howell, and Mary Ann sit at the dining table.

RADIO (V.O.)

(filtered)

In Saturday's game, the Slippery Rock Teachers squeaked by the Polytech Institute to a crucial win of ninety-three to nothing.

Gilligan enters.

GILLIGAN

Hi, everybody.

MR HOWELL

Be quiet. We're listening to the news.

RADIO (V.O.)

(filtered)

Oh, here's a late bulletin on that mysterious film washed ashore on a raft.

SKIPPER

Hey, did you hear that? They found our film!

PROFESSOR

Wonderful. Boy, I hope it's--

Ginger clasps her hands as if in prayer and looks skyward.

GINGER

My career, I'm ruined.

GILLIGAN

Oh, we're going to be rescued.

RADIO (V.O.)

(filtered)

This film, made by unknowns, was the unanimous choice for first prize at the Cannes Film Festival. In a statement released today, the film was described as a work of genius.

MR. HOWELL, MRS. HOWELL, AND PROFESSOR

listen to the radio.

RADIO (V.O.) (cont'd)

(filtered)

Particularly effective were the numerous blacked out scenes where the audience was left to use ...

GILLIGAN AND SKIPPER

Gilligan stands slightly behind Skipper

RADIO (V.O.) (cont'd)

(filtered)

... its imagination. Though it was anonymously submitted, ...

GINGER AND MARY ANN

RADIO (V.O.) (cont'd)

(filtered)

... the committee is quite certain the film is either the work of the Swedish master, ...

MR. HOWELL, MRS. HOWELL, PROFESSOR

RADIO (V.O.) (cont'd)

(filtered)

... Ingmar Bergman, or that Italian genius, Vittorio de Sica, or possibly it was the combined effort of both. It was felt that this ultra-modern example of surrealism will bring back silent pictures.

BACK TO SCENE

RADIO (V.O.) (cont'd)

(filtered)

Well, whoever is responsible for this masterpiece, your prize is waiting. All you have to do is come to Cannes and get it.

GILLIGAN

You hear that?

GILLIGAN AND SKIPPER

GILLIGAN (cont'd)

We won the festival. First prize. Maybe it's a motorcycle.

Skipper removes his cap. Gilligan turns and roars like a motorcycle. Skipper hits Gilligan on his butt with his cap. Gilligan races into the jungle Skipper replaces his cap. Mary Ann looks dejected. Professor places his face in his palm.

DISSOLVE TO:

EXT. GILLIGAN'S ISLAND - ESTABLISHING SHOT - DAY

FADE OUT.

THE END